Be-You-Tiful. A Very Cringe ‘Word’, Containing a Very Good Message.

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم

I… probably should…

Eat less chicken. And, less meat.

Chicken and meat are kind of… ‘luxury proteins’. They’re kind of heavy to digest, also.


Yesterday, I’d gone on a little outing with my best friend, AlHamduli Llah , and someone else had come along: a friend of hers whom my friend had wanted for me to meet.

This new friend of mine‘s name: ن.

And she is just sooooo kind, and sooooo cool, Allah hummabārik.

And beautiful.

Except: … I actually haven’t seen her face yet!

  • ن is a Niqābi: she covers her face when she is in public. I’d seen her yesterday wearing a lovely green-coloured Niqāb. With a clip cutely affixed to one side.

Yesterday, I’d been carrying a few things I’d just bought, in my hands.

And: ن happened to have an empty white carrier bag in her backpack. She’d noticed that I might have been struggling a bit, got the bag out, and then put my things inside for me.

And all three of us had gotten some sushi together. One of the others had the genius idea to: share three dishes we’d bought, between ourselves. So that: we each get to try each thing.

A: spicy dragon roll. And: two variations of salmon-and-avocado sushi.

  • Basically: one thing that ن had spoken to us about had been… her decision to cut down on how much chicken/meat she consumes. I’ve forgotten just how this had come up in our conversation, but essentially: Maa Shaa Allah , ن, although she loves chicken, [same!] she now tends to only eat it once a month.

And, when she does have chicken/meat: she likes to ensure that it is Tayyib. Organic; that the chickens had room to roam around before being slaughtered in the proper, Halāl way. And, that they’d been treated like living beings rather than products for ‘mass production’.

ن added that: since making this change, she’s actually noticed a change in her energy levels, Maa Shaa Allah .

*So: I’m going to try it. In Shaa Allah . To focus on eating: more produce, more fish. Less [I love you chicken, but] chicken. And meat.


Perhaps one reason as to why ن requires those high energy levels in the first place is that:

She works as a cycling instructor. [And simply hoists her bike seat higher, so that her ‘Abaya doesn’t get caught in the chains. Pro-tip right there.]

And ن had also been considering doing/teaching skateboarding, but explains that she ‘cares about [her] brain too much’. We’d actually, all three of us, been sitting in a place where people had been skateboarding nearby. Skate, record on their phones, fall down. I think we’d witnessed at least a few injuries there, yesterday.

[ن has saved me as ‘Sadia Sushi’ on her phone. And she’s: ن Sushi on mine also.]

This girl, Maa Shaa Allah , Allah hummabārik, is active. Like: today, she’s going rock-climbing, In Shaa Allah . She’d actually invited me to go too: it’s a (ticketed) Muslim women’s-only event. But: I simply didn’t manage to book a ticket for myself in time.

  • Tomorrow, In Shaa Allah , ن will also be going horseback-riding.

When you make choices and decisions with your Creator in mind:

He really does open your whole life up. Things are made easier, and more beautiful, AlHamduli Llah .

  • Some people, when looking at a Niqābi woman, might feel inclined to assume that life is somehow more ‘restricted’ for her.

But ن essentially explains: what is there that she can’t do, that she wants to? Apart from, perhaps: communicating well with deaf people, but she says that if she needs to speak to a deaf person, she can lift her Niqāb to do so.


Once, someone had approached ن to explain that she’s in England. Shouldn’t be wearing that here.

And: ن has a sense of humour. She’s good with conversing with strangers, Maa Shaa Allah , and at some point during that interaction, started showing her support for England by saying: Englaaaand! Englaaaand!

  • The guy suddenly said something like how: he’d love to see her face. One day: he’d love to see it. And that, I think, had weirded ن out at least a little.

Another thing that ن likes to do is:

She runs her own Muslim marital matchmaking service, Allah hummabārik. Along with her brother: while he runs the men’s side of things, she runs the women’s.

ن had essentially explained that: something that had inspired her to do this had been… Her own personal experience with certain ‘Muslim Halāl dating’ apps/services.

Like how: ‘Muz’ (which had once been ‘Muzmatch’, but which has now been ‘rebranded’,) seemingly accepts just anyone onto their platform. Some of the people on there… aren’t even Muslim!

And: I don’t know. It just makes it sound a bit unserious to abbreviate ‘Muslim’ to… ‘Muz‘, in any case.


But ن’s service: the service that she takes part in running, they make sure that they basically vet any candidates. People who are enrolled onto their service tend to be people who are within their extended circles somehow. And:

‘Prospectives’ first each have to fill out a form.

And then: a video call takes place. Between either ن or her brother (and I think they might also have other team members,) and: the prospective marriage candidates. But both of the candidates also have to have someone there with them. Be they: a parent, or a sibling.

One pro of doing this: they’re less likely to fib about themselves, and exaggerate, and just ‘assume a persona’ or something, for the sake of being ‘liked’, and so on. Often, the people who ‘know about you best‘, on a real level, and about your habits, tendencies, vices, and so on, are: the people who live with you.

So, there’s that.

And, after this video call meeting:

ن and her brother will go ahead and contact references. They ask that each of the people who are using this service of theirs [which is called: Sakīnah matchmaking services. ‘Sakīnahmeaning: tranquility, peace, which is something that we’re meant to find, in marriage] provides, I think she’d said, five references. Points of contact. To verify information that the candidate has said about themselves, cross-reference, collect more useful information, and so on.

  • Bear in mind that: matchmaking can be a complex operation. And: it’s a weighty responsibility. Because: you’re not just picking out… some new furniture for your home or something. Or even: merely an employee for your business. But: the pursuit of marriage involves… searching for a whole life partner for yourself.
  • A meal partner. A homie. Someone whose face you’ll wake up to [so make sure it’s a pretty one!] quite a lot. Potential father/mother of your kids. Etc.

Attraction.

Something that is very important, when it comes to considering prospective spouses is:

Of course, their religion. Their character: values, behaviour, and the rest.

And, also, of course: how physically attracted you are towards them. Quite an important consideration.

  • In the Islamic tradition: generally, when the prospective groom goes to meet a woman, they should look at one another properly. And a substantial amount of physical, as well as emotional, spiritual, and so on: attraction needs to be there.

If it’s not there: they’re likely not the one for you. Don’t force it!


Attract what you are/expect.

One reason as to why meeting ن had inspired me is that:

She just seems so wonderfully, quietly, confident, AlHamduli Llah . In whom she is, in her Purpose as a Servant of Allah . Conversations with her are entertaining: sometimes like fireworks are going off.

And, Maa Shaa Allah : we also learn things from her. Just by her being… her.

  • ن explained how, you know, it’s okay to know that you have a ‘type’, in considerations pertaining to marriage. Why wouldn’t that be okay? That’s something natural, which has been placed in your heart, and which is good so long as we adhere to the appropriate rules and boundaries.

The most important consideration when choosing a spouse.

And/or a close friend. Is: religion. Are you religiously compatible?


You know: will they… find it a bit surprising that you pray five times a day. Or: will they be someone who will lovingly encourage you to get up, up, up, and pray?

Might they… subtly mock at your other religious endeavours? And think that the steps you’re taking are ‘too much’ for them?

Or: will they whole-heartedly encourage you, and inspire you, simply by way of being them, to do better?


[I know someone who had reverted into Islam. She takes it upon herself to pray, Allah hummabārik, and not just that, but: she likes to pray at the earliest possible time. She also wears a headscarf, does charity work, and so on.

And: a ‘born Muslim’ individual from work used to subtly mock at her by calling her ‘Abdul‘ as a result of her efforts… [yikes.]]

  • I cannot stress this enough. How: we need to choose the right company for ourselves. The right friends, the right spouse[s. Since men are permitted to have more than one].
  • We’re not only ‘what we eat’. We are definitely also defined by: the company that we keep. Not, in any way, a ‘light’ consideration, that one.

Look around you: who are the people that your heart feels magnetised towards? Whom do you love? That tells you something significant about yourself, you know.


Anyway, at this little outing with my friend ت and the friend that she’d introduced me to, AlHamduli Llah : ن. I just felt like… I was being a bit… moody. My energy just hadn’t quite been there.

This, of course, is natural: that we ebb and flow, in various ways, and that we have our cycles and so on. And, still: I wanted to meet with ن again somehow to apologise and everything.

You’ll never guess what happened the next day, Subhaan Allah , Subhaan Allah .


In the evening: I’d gone to my nan’s house. And my aunt, my uncle’s wife, had brushed my hair, using amla oil, and put it into a single braid. ‘Little’ things like that: so cute and kind, Maa Shaa Allah .

And, bless: she told us how the person who does this for her own son, my little cousin د, is… her dad, د’s grandfather. He puts some oil in his hair, does a hair treatment for him. That is just sooooo cute. Maa Shaa Allah . [د has a head full of curly hair, Allah hummabārik].

“One of the great joys in life is having one’s hair brushed.” 

— Quote from a movie we’d seen together once.


It’s September now, and things are changing.

As they do. An intrinsic part of nature: change.

Now it’s Sunday, يوم الأحد. And: yesterday, my aunt and I had gone to… the British Museum (here in London,) together.

This aunt of mine, ف, lives in Kent. And, we’d been making plans to maybe meet up on a different day, but: then she told me that she’d be coming to London to go on an outing with some friends of hers. So: we could basically spend the first part of the day together.

And so: in the morning, I’d taken two buses. To: le British Museum. [She’d insinuated that I’m a nerd for choosing to go to a museum. And then casually revealed that she’d been to a crab museum the other day, so. ‘There were lots of memes there’ though, apparently.]

Look how cool technology is:

And consider how: maps first… began. Inscriptions in rocks, and other materials, presumably. And then on paper. And now Google Maps has this ‘Live View’ thing.

Let’s think about money too. Subhaan Allah . Beginning with ‘bartering systems’. You know: your onions for my salt. Your goats for my sheep. And so on.

And: using gold and silver. Buying things with gold and silver coins.

Bank notes. And then, the digital stuff: cards. PIN numbers.

Contactless cards.

Le Bitcoin.


Fascinatingly, recently my uncle sent me something about how what we’re known to term, ‘Ancient Egyptian’ civilisation… lasted over 3000 years.

Cleopatra lived closer to the invention of bitcoin than the building of the pyramids of Giza. They were already ancient to her.”

“We have records from the time of Ramses II of ancient Egyptians doing archaeology on monuments that were already a thousand years old to them.


So I had to wait for my aunt for just a bit outside the museum. This is part of what it looks like:

And, throughout the day yesterday: I kept remembering something funny a friend of mine had said in a group chat once. And I would see things that reminded me of that, and start smiling in public.

[Like a… psycho. The other day, I’d bitten a Kit-Kat and someone had insinuated that I might be that. A psycho.]

Well: outside the museum, I didn’t really have anything to do. So, I thought about the funny thing from the group chat again. And laughed a bit in public. And then looked at my phone so that maybe people wouldn’t think I’m deranged.

  • My aunt says I might be “deeply disturbed” for finding this ‘dumb’ thing funny. But: I’m pretty sure she’d laughed too when I told her about it.

“And that it is He who makes [one] laugh and weep.”

Qur’an, (53:43).


I like the look of swords.

Here are some swords: enjoy.

And here are some old bowls that might be nice to eat Coco Pops out of:

Oh, wait. Upon closer look: it was made for use as a wash basin. Not for Coco Pops.

Here is an old Mihrāb [a niche in the wall of a masjid, which indicates which way we should pray.]:

I love the blues in these:


[This way, this way. You don’t want to get lost now, do you?]


There is a genocide that is currently going on in China. Of Uyghur Muslims. Concentration camps, organ-harvesting. But maybe: not that many people seem to care all that much. Because they might have this ‘idea’ that if the victims are Muslim, then, somehow: it doesn’t ‘matter’.


ولا غالب إلا الله

There is no Victor except Allah


Do you like coffee?

Interestingly, in a similar way to how some ‘Sufi mystics’ used to make use of coffee in order to try to stay up at night to worship [although: we’re not meant to do that, I don’t think. Sleep is important, and is a blessing that is necessary.].

Well: in Japan, I think I’d read at the museum that the culture of drinking green tea had come about because… meditators wanted to stay up in order to meditate.


Coffea bengalensis.

A coffee bean plant from India. Presumably: from the Bengal region of the subcontinent. That’s where my family’s from.


Islam.

From West Africa, to Southeast Asia. Subhaan Allah .

All this beauty, all this diversity.


Again, it’s so interesting how things change over time. And, how: some things from the past are still… so recognisable.

Like this old dress, which looks quite like a dress you can buy from Green Street today, albeit with some differences.


Lunch.

The Most Important Meal of the Day?

My aunt bought us lunch from the museum café.

I put the sticker on myself afterwards. I like to embarrass my aunt.

This aunt of mine: is a certified cool aunt, Maa Shaa Allah . She… is super kind, but often ‘acts’ tough, and ‘cool’.

But: she’s the one who loves to read, and who’d… casually brought out a baby blanket from her wee tote bag that day, which she’s been knitting for my baby cousin, her niece.

The ‘tough, meanthing. It’s a façade. I see right through it.

Often: ف, perhaps ‘accidentally’, lets the wee mask slip, and says something genuinely so sweet, revealing her true loving nature. There’s a particular sweet text from her that I’ve got, which I might print out, frame, and send to her house for fun.

Anyway. Also: as well as having volunteered with a suicide prevention helpline, Maa Shaa Allah , [I forgot to ask her yesterday if she still does that,] ف is studying, In Shaa Allah, for her PhD in Psychology.

Something that is so cool about her is that: as part of her PhD studies, she also lectures university students! Allah hummabārik. She’s not even that much older than me. I love this woman!

And I love… embarrassing her. It’s kind of a hobby, I think.

Like, at the museum: I found a fan. And wanted to speak into it.

Heee-llooooo.”

She threatened to walk away from me. [But when I basically threatened to walk away from her, she didn’t seem to care so much. And just carried on walking her way.]


I love the way my aunt thinks, Allah hummabārik. Emotionally attuned, rational, and soothing.

Currently, as part of her studies, she’s doing something about the relationship between climate change, and religion.

She’d also left me, effortlessly, with some pearls of wisdom yesterday. One thing that’s quite memorable from what she’d said, I’d say, is about how:

  • The people that you get attached to. Essentially become a part of… you. And maybe that’s one reason why break-ups, old friends moving away, and so on, can hurt so much: it feels like you’re losing a part of yourself.

And that:

  • You know when you’re far away from someone. And: you think you ‘know’ them. So much of that can just be… projection. You’re projecting parts of yourself, and seeing them played on a ‘blank screen’ of sorts: them.

In the absences of true, realistic, knowledge about other people, other places. And real, day-to-day time spent with them… In the absence of all that:

Projection, projection, projection.

They are just as human as you are.

[Isn’t there a reason as to why you and another person: can be looking at the very same thing/person/place. And be seeing two quite different things…?]


Now, here are some old combs, and jewellery pieces.

Hairdressing, for example, had been quite important to… the Ancient Egyptians. [I don’t know why the recurring theme of Egypt keeps popping up in my life, around this time. In Shaa Allah : perhaps it’s because it’s in my Qadr to go there sometime soon…]


I. Love. ‘Nerdiness’. I can’t help it.

And anyone who acts like it’s ‘lame’ to love nerdiness… Is probably secretly quite nerdy themselves too. Because: imagine having no passions, no interest in the world and universe, nothing that makes your eyes light up, and makes you want to talk about it, even for ages.

Some might call that ‘cool‘. To just… act like you don’t care about things. Being ‘steel-faced’ and all. But I think that’s… a kinda sad way to do things. A tragedy. An injustice to the fact of your humanity:

  • You’re an Ennobled-by- Allah , learning, awesome, with-lots-of-feelings full human being. AlHamduli Llah !

Anyway: at one point, at the museum, I thought… Oh, this person might think I’m being ‘lame’ and ‘nerdy’ if they were to overhear me talk about… But, wait. They’re literally at a museum, presumably by choice, too! So perhaps we have an interest in the world in common, actually.

  • You know: I tried the ‘other way’ at one point. To just… put on a ‘mask’. Act ‘cool’, ‘befriend’ the ‘popular girls’. Back when I was like, eleven/twelve years old. It ‘worked’, I suppose, for a while.
  • And: in truth, it was just… so… blehhh. What’s the point of ‘jumping through hoops’, masking so much, in order to be ‘liked’. When you can legit effortlessly be yourself, and be so beautifully loved for you? Being ‘cool’ in that way: might lead to more people ‘liking’ you. But, issa about quality, and not necessarily quantity, at the end of the day.
  • [When I went to talk into a fan for a second time, I think, I said: “Heee-lloooo.” And my aunt said: “looo-seeer.” Sigh. I love her.]


Subhaan Allah . Look at the world. The things here, and how they develop. And: how traditions are shared, information and ideas are exchanged.


There was a ‘time waterfall’ at the museum, also. Digital numbers cascading [cascade: to fall downwards. Like how waterfalls do.].

  • Keep changing
  • Connect with everything
  • Continue forever

I don’t know if you can relate to this but:

Sometimes, it can feel easy to look at others. People who are… at a distance from ourselves, let’s face it. And think: they must ‘have it together’, ‘be normal’ (whatever ‘normal’ actually is,) and super ‘confident‘ and so on.

  • While we’re… so very… human.

I think we’re projecting. You’re spending all this time with yourself, morning to night. Have you ever spent a full day with any of these people: whom you might be… idealising? And seeing only from the outside, and projecting ideas upon?


My aunt ف and I topped off our time together at a nearby Caffè Nero. Another country that seems to keep popping up, in various ways, in my life recently is, for some reason: Italia.

Caffè Nero’s hot chocolates, people. >>>

I don’t know how we’d got there, but something we’d started talking about somehow had been… the idea of ‘Prosperity Gospel‘. You know: how some people think that material wealth is a sign that God has ‘Favoured’ them. But: it’s not.

Some ‘Christians’, for example, who might even use ‘religion’ in order to justify… their heavily racist views. Imagine if they’d met ‘Isa (AS). [‘Romanised’: ‘Jesus‘]. Not really a materially wealthy man, I don’t think he’d been. And: a man from the Middle East. Like, from Palestine.

Would some of these self-proclaimed ‘followers of Christ’ love, or even like, the real ‘Isa (AS), if they were to meet him?

  • He… wasn’t white. Also: a lot of these ‘pictures’ of him that you’ll find in churches. Are literally some made-up images of a random man who looks like he’s of European descent. So… there’s that.

Awwwwww. My ‘mean-acting’ lovely aunt is just so cute, Maa Shaa Allah . If I were to call her cute to her face, however, she might just say: ‘ew‘. The blanket she’s knitting. Awwwwwww.

Anyway. Another thing, a theme, a motif, if you will. That seems to be popping up in my life recurrently these days:

Is that of marriage. My dad mentioned it to me the other day, and he rarely really does.

My brother randomly told me he wants me to get married soon, so that he can have my room. He said that I should marry a rich man, no less, so that he can have a room in our ‘big house’ or something.

And so on.

I’ve also recently been asked, tentatively, [tentative: not certain, not a fixed date or anything.] if I’d want to be one of the chaperones at someone’s prospective date with someone else. Which meant a lot to me, to be asked. I might just: sit there, drink hot chocolate or something, accidentally drop some on myself. And listen to, and be humoured by, a sweet conversation.

  • Keep it Halāl, and: watch how Allah Blesses you and your life!

At least one person I know is currently using a ‘Halāl dating app’. I don’t think I ever will: but that’s just a personal thing of mine.

To speak to someone online is never the same as face-to-face interactions. Photos, for one thing, are only reflections of light. And there is no camera that compares to el human eye.

So much accidentally gets ‘filtered out’ with these things.

Moreover: to ‘get to know‘ someone through… texting. I think it just opens up all these unhelpful doors to so much…

*Imagine someone saying this into a fan.*

Prooo-jeeeec-tioooon.

  • Now imagine my aunt saying something (jokingly, lovingly,) mean in response.

London Central Masjid.

Recently, I’d received an email from the London Central Masjid, near Regent’s Park, about an Open Day that would be taking place there. For non-Muslims and Muslims alike.

And so, that day (yesterday,) I’d decided to go.

I’d also invited one of my friends to come along. She said she would, but then circumstances arose, and she couldn’t make it. So I went by myself.

That. Is one beautiful masjid, Maa Shaa Allah . With beautiful people working there, and worshipping there. Their smiles, their kindness.

  • Have you ever visited a mosque before? If not: don’t worry. This way, this way. And: try not to get lost! [I’m so lame, I know. But it’s kinda fun.]

Upon closer look:


The House of Allah :

And, one of the staircases inside:


Some Arabic calligraphy, from over a thousand years ago:

Une quick bathroom selfie:

Now, here is… a table. [Have you ever seen a table before? If not, don’t worry. I gotchu:]

  • It’s actually Sunnah to sit on the floor. And my friend ن had explained how: it’s actually better for your posture, too. To sit on the floor. And so, for example: it’s in Afghani, and some Pakistanis’, tradition to… Roll out a special mat for mealtimes. And everyone sits together and eats.
  • There is so much beauty in… simplicity.

The library at this masjid, which I think is actually quite new, is very nice indeed, Maa Shaa Allah .

  • Why learn about ‘Islam’ via… Netflix, and ‘the news’. When: we’ve got people, masaajid (mosques,) and so many books, to learn Truth from?

At this event, the masjid had been giving books for free: each visitor could take a book, and a postcard, free of charge. I took the one entitled, ‘Search for Serenity’.


On that day (yesterday,) I’d fallen in love with my Deen all over again, I’d say.

‘From First Principles’:

  • Muslims: we are people who are moving with the rhythms of Allah ‘s beautiful Earth. Waking up before the sun, in order to pray, and ask of Him, and give thanks.

And then: the noon prayer. The afternoon one. The one at the time of sunset. And the one for when the sky is cloaked in black.

Fajr, Dhuhr, ‘Asr, Maghrib, and ‘Isha.


I sat down to listen to one of the talks. Also got myself some water: you know, that thing that all humans need, the transparent and liquid material?

Anyway. Let’s talk a bit about growth. And how: our Creator , Allah , Brings about the growth of things.

Like how: Ibrahīm (AS) and his son. Had laid down those first foundations of the House in Makkah. And: look at it now, Subhaan Allah .


After listening to this talk, I read a bit of the book I’d picked up.

Let’s think about… the human being. And: about ‘Psychology’.

All those things that it is in our nature to seek:

Purpose.

Meaning.

Connection.

Health.

Routine.

Hope.

Comfort.

And so on.

We find it all… in Islam, AlHamduli Llah .

Why ever look for ‘happiness’ away from… the very One who Made it?


At the event, I’d also overheard a lady talking about how much of an animal-lover she is, Maa Shaa Allah : she has rescue animals in her garden.

Connected to how my aunt ف and I had been talking about religion and climate change: as Muslims, we know that we are Allah ‘s stewards of the Earth. For the time being at least: this is our home, so let’s take care of it.

The sister had also been speaking about how she’s gone swimming in places like Algeria, and a few other countries.

  • Something that’s quite messed up is how: France won’t let Muslim women relax at the beach and/or swim unless they… show skin. And Egypt [there it is again!] seems to be following suit with this. So strange.
  • May we never become sheep who are colonised by people who claim that public nakedness is ‘freedom’ as well as, maybe, the height of ‘culture’. And who then try to humiliate Muslim women who show that you can swim and sit on sand without being naked.


Also: get this.

Recently, I think after being asked: I decided that I likely wouldn’t set up a ‘Halāl dating’ profile. And I don’t think I’d want for members of my family to introduce us either.

So, I’d been thinking: I want some sort of ‘meet cute‘ situation.

I’m at least a bit of a ‘romantic’. I love interesting stories. I actually quite love awkwardness, among other things. It’s so… humanising. And can be very, very cute in other people.

[People who seem too ‘confidently charming’… might be… sociopaths and so on, so…]

Anyway, Subhaan Allah : I know that Allah , the Best Author , is Writing my story for me. And yours, too, for you.

Yesterday, while I’d been sitting and reading, someone had skipped a seat, and had come and sat near me. He’d asked me where I’m ‘from’.

That question. Do I say: London? Or: the world? Or: where my parents and grandparents had been born, Bangladesh?

He said I don’t look like I’m from there. And then started talking about his own background. And about how he could teach me Arabic, if I wanted. Which was a kind offer.

But then: he’d asked me if I’m single, and asked if I wanted to get tea with him sometime. I didn’t know how to politely say no. He was really nice, smart, and kind. But… I didn’t feel physically drawn to him. Not because he’s ‘ugly’ in any way. Just not for mey.


I lowkey felt quite awkward, because I had nobody with me at this event. And I felt embarrassed that maybe the people sitting a bit behind us had overheard everything. I think this man also had a friend or two at this event with him, but they’d been elsewhere, maybe at the back of the room, but I felt too awkward to look.

Anyway, I just said that I don’t really meet up with men alone and everything. But he basically said that it’s just tea, what would the problem be?

Maybe this was dumb of me: but after trying to politely say no, he asked if he could have my number. I don’t know if this was dumb or clever of me, but: I just gave it. My actual number, because: I can’t lie. And also: if he’d tried to call me there and then…

And then he got up to leave, and said goodbye in Arabic.

I felt so awkward. Not because he was being rude or anything: it probably takes quite a bit of bravery for a man to approach a… [no way. I’m an adult now?!] woman.

  • I didn’t want to accidentally bump into him on the streets, also…

Subhaan Allah . Allah Knew everything.

Guess whom I’d found there, at the event that day (yesterday,)?

Hint: Green Niqāb with a cute clip on the side. ن!

ن Sushi!

She’d been volunteering at the event, Maa Shaa Allah . So: even though we’d met each other the previous day, in the Canada Water area. We didn’t know that we’d both be going to this event, at this masjid, and that we’d bump into each other, the very next day! Subhaan Allah .

  • ‘Coincidences’: they are Signs of Allah .

Anyway, I did get to apologise to ن in case I’d come across as being a bit… moody the previous day. But she hadn’t seemed to notice.

And: ن also offered to give me her container of lunch (and a second little container, containing sauces). She didn’t want to waste the food, and also didn’t want to eat it.

Because, Allah Bless this beautiful soul: she didn’t want the chicken/meat in it, but also didn’t want to come across as being rude for not wanting the food. So she’d taken the container, and had only eaten some rice from it.


ن went to pray ‘Asr, but I waited outside the prayer area, since: women don’t pray when it’s our time-of-the-month.

I don’t think that’s gross to say: it’s just a fact of life.

Anyway, I looked at the bookshop inside the masjid. Went outside and sat down.

And: my phone had died. Classic me. And so: I had no way of contacting ن, to tell her where I was.

Eventually: how did I find her? I’d seen a sister in the courtyard of the masjid, wearing a bike helmet, and holding a bike. It was her!

Her next stop, Maa Shaa Allah : a meeting at a different masjid, in East London. And then: the rock-climbing event. Subhaan Allah . What a woman!


At this event, outside:

I’d also seen someone else I recognise. Paul Williams. A Muslim academic and theologian; his YouTube channel is awesome, Allah hummabārik. It’s called ‘Blogging Theology’.

This is a YouTube Short I’d found later that he’d actually recorded while there, at the masjid:


That Allah is the One who is Guiding us. What a beautiful story yours is, and will be, In Shaa Allah .

Our hearts: He Knows us better than anyone, and He Knows us better than we know our own selves.

He Made us! In physical terms, in terms of soul and spirit. You’re a Creation of Allah ‘s. Truly beautiful: dontchu forget it.

Which people, things, and places, does your heart feel very drawn towards? This will tell you so much about yourself!

  • I’m very glad, AlHamduli Llah , that Allah Decided that I would meet ن. That I would go to this event. And so on.
  • You’ve just gotta relax, and be you. And then: you’ll know what, and whom, you truly want in this life of yours. And whom you are, at the end of the day, and what is yours.


This morning I’d essentially received a ‘Good Morning’ text. From that person from yesterday.

I don’t really know what to do, because I don’t want to hurt someone’s feelings but also don’t want to ‘lead someone on’.

Anyway, the message itself is really nice:

A Qur’anic Āyah, followed by Good Morning, and a wish that Allah blesses you with answered Du’as. [Why doesn’t my aunt do nice things like this for me, huh?

Jk. She bought me lunch yesterday so.]

“When My servants ask you ˹O Prophet˺ about Me: I am truly near. I respond to one’s prayer when they call upon Me.”

Qur’an, (2:186).

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