.بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم
At the first school I had attended, there had been a girl who seemed to really like… beetroot. Oh, and a different boy [memory unlocked!] who really seemed to like… red onion.
Every day, on the side of the school lunch canteen, there had been a salad bar. Callum, who loved red onions, would… love eating red onion. And م would put beetroot on her plate every single day, as far as I know [Callum and his family, including a good former friend of mine, Thomas, had moved to Ireland. Meanwhile, م still lives near me, I think.]
Red onion: to me, it’s just not nice to have uncooked onion. That sharp onion-y taste: not the best, in my opinion.
Oh, and beetroot: purple stains, and personally, I’d rather pick out good ol’ broccoli, or carrots, or lettuce or something instead.
I imagine, also, that some people really like blue cheese. Maybe: sort of how I love pistachios, and chocolate, and chicken (separately).
Some people… are vegan. So chicken is a no-no; some do not like chocolate: too sweet, for some. And then: some might prefer, say… cashew nuts, or… snacking on sunflower seeds, instead.
With our friends, and with our family, with people in general: they may… dislike core parts of us. I think we’re all entitled to our inner opinions, but subjective criticisms don’t always need to be voiced. And if/when they are, because it’s somehow better for them to be: there’s a way, surely?
For example, a real-life example: I know of someone who had been told by someone close to her that… she (Person B) does not like Person A’s sense of humour. ‘Too’… X, or Y, or Z, for her liking…
Ladies and gentlemen, I love Person A’s sense of humour. Am I somehow ‘wrong’ in doing so, merely because this ‘Person B’ has her own personal take on things?!
Person A even got complimented on her sense of humour/way of being in her absence, by a mutual friend of ours. And, yet: maybe it’s easy to start ruminating on what a certain person has voiced about you. Something ‘negative’ in their eyes.
Some might love that you, hypothetically speaking, are… outgoing. Others may criticise how (same things, different words/perspectives…) you’re… ‘attention-seeking’.
You stay on the side of things, and are selective with your words. In the eyes of some, maybe: ‘antisocial’. To others: ‘a gentle spirit. And intentional’ in what you do and say.
Some may absolutely not like the taste of beetroot. The purple stains, and the earthy taste. Red onions. Chocolate. Blue cheese.
Do we change ourselves, fundamentally, just so a particular person can ‘like’ us ‘more’?
[If such people are in your family, I’m not saying run away and find another family and change your very name and identity, however…] It’s likely better for your soul, where it is good, and where you have the autonomy to, surround yourself with people who embrace, love, and encourage you. Red-onion-obsession and whatnot and all.
And what if, while you may be seeking to disguise and get rid of, even, a strong liking to blue cheese, so that some Person C is ‘pacified’, placated, made ‘happy’…
But all the while, what if there’s a Person G (for gangsta. And also for ‘good friend’, I guess) who… has a blue cheese poster on her very wall because she loves it that much? What if she’s having a blue cheese sandwich right now, for lunch, as we
speak write and read?
In the right places, and with the right people, you will be loved widely, and deeply, and holistically, In Shaa Allah. They might even come to learn of how much you love beetroot, and then return you with a basket of beets… They might love that awesome purple vegetable just as much as you do (or, even more! You might have even inspired them to like it even more…) while, perhaps, the ‘haters’ (naysayers) might spend their finite time and energy saying things like, ‘ew. Beetroot.’